easter

Today: April 23, 2001 is a day i will NEVER forget.

It's Easter time again, this will be the 16th Easter I've experienced in my lifetime, but the first easter iv experienced as a born again, forgiven, grace given, child of the king.

I've been so excited about this entire holiday, its without a doubt, always been my favorite. Pretty new dress, lots of pictures, coloring eggs, spending time with the people you love, board games, lots of food, and school holidays.

This holiday is NOW my favorite for all the right reasons. 

Because of the fact that this is my first Easter, i wanted to get the full effect, i didn't want to miss a thing. So, Thursday night as i was watching a worship service in Alabama, on my computer, they showed clips of "The Passion of The Christ". We own the movie, but I've never seen it. Its always been "too much" for me. I knew i couldn't handle the graphic scenes, and i figured that i would just stick to "DeAnna's idea of how that Friday two thousand years ago, went." I just finished the movie...

Opening scene, Jesus in the garden, with his three best friends, praying, sweating drops of blood because he knew what was about to happen, was when the first tear fell from my face. 

Throughout the entire movie, scene after scene, i didn't even realize i was crying, until the sound of my screams distracted me from the movie long enough to wipe my eyes. I was sobbing, i was screaming "NO" every time they hit him.. because i wanted more than anything to take his place. It was DEANNA that should be mocked, hit, punched, slapped, whipped, cut, beaten, broken.. because i HAVE done wrong. i HAVE sinned. i DESERVE it. all of it. every single slap. Jesus... DIDN'T.

Jesus was perfect. 

Jesus came INTO this world to save man.

He who knew NO sin, became sin, that WE might be become righteous.

Many emotions rushed through me, sometimes all at once. I was upset, of the way they were mistreating MY Jesus. I was angry, that Jesus CHOSE to take the mockery, that he remained silent when they made fun of Him. I was humbled, at JUST how unworthy i am. I was filled with peace during the last scene of the movie...

It had been three days since Jesus had taken his last breath. The camera captures the stone being rolled away. And where the world expected to find a dead body, we discovered white cloths.. and a risen Savior.

Easter, can be summed up in one word for me:

LOVE.

For God SO loved YOU, that he sent his perfect flesh and blood, to die a criminal's death, if you would simply BELIEVE in Him, you will receive the gift of eternal life... forever in paradise.

John 3:16

It wasn't nails that held Jesus on the cross, it was His love for you!

I'm still crying, i still feel sick to my stomach, i still have raccoon eyes from makeup and i cant catch my breath.. but tonight has been the greatest night of my entire life.

If you've never seen the movie, i can't encourage you enough.. watch it. 

Yes, its graphic.

But i promise you, it was graphic 2,000 years ago.

This stuff is REAL.

EVERYone should watch it. It shows JUST how much he went through for you.

It makes you feel small.

It leaves you amazed.

Have a blessed Easter.

Dear Jesus.. Thank You.

i love you.

-DeAnna

iv deciced to blog: GOD IS LOVE!

So, I've decided to give "blogging" a try. It will give me a chance to share my testimony, my heart, my thoughts, my dreams, and of course.. JESUS :)

Here's a summarized version of MY testimony:

I grew up in a Christian home, accepted Jesus at the age of 6 along side my brother who is a year older than me. I was always TOLD what to believe, never once did i ever doubt that Jesus was the son of God. I was told he died for me, and so i had no reason to believe any different. I grew up knowing those facts, and spent all my time trying to avoid "doing wrong." [not to say that i actually succeeded in avoided all "wrong." no no no. i did plenty WRONG, it was always followed by guilt and regret... always.]

But, the summer of 2010 was a summer that will forever be marked my my book as being "the season i FOUND myself." You see, God placed some amazing people in my life during that summer, that spent time with me and encouraged me as God was working in my life. The entire summer was dedicated to serving others. I spent a week at church camp, a week on a mission trip, and all the days in between working with the children's program at our church. 

The focus of my summer was spent, not on "NOT doing wrong" but simply on: "following Jesus. being a servant". It was then, when my focus changed, that i suddenly realized, i had Christianity all wrong. I had spent 16 years of my life believing in a Man i didn't know. I had a twisted view on what my purpose in life was, i had a twisted view on who I was, and i had a twisted view of who GOD was..

One night: July 27, 2010 at THE BASEMENT, i met Jesus Christ for myself. His anointed presence in that room, was overwhelming. His spirit was thick, and his love covered that room! Jesus sat right beside me on the floor, and whispered his truth in my ear...

Here's what i learned in a nutshell:

GOD IS LOVE.

That's it. 

He LOVES me. For me. Not for what i have done, or what i will become. There's NOTHING i can do to make him love me less, there is nothing i could to to make him love me more. 

When i discovered my identity in HIM, that's when i discovered everything about me. 

Plain and simple: i took all of my mess up's, my broken heart, my failures, my "distorted view of myself", my guilt, my pain, my insecurity, my "need" for a relationship, my LIFE.. and laid them at the feet of Jesus. I realized that i am a complete mess, and as hard as i try, i can never fix myself. The instant i did that: his love, forgiveness and grace washed over me with a feeling i can't explain.. and little by little, Jesus stood me back on my own two feet.

One of my favorite chorus' we sing at church is "lean on me". 

"Lean on me, when you have no strength to stand. When you feel you're going under, hold tighter to my hand. Lean on me, when your heart begins to bleed. When you come to the place that I'm all you have, you will find I'm all you need."

 This is SO true. Jesus BEGS you to lean on Him. He is all you need in life. You can never expect anyone or anything to "complete you" until you fall, head first, madly in love with Jesus Christ. He loves you with an unconditional love. A love that can't be bought. A love that will never change. A love that will never fail.
He doesn't care about your past, he cares about YOU!

"Come home and I'll throw the biggest party heaven has EVER seen." -Luke 15:7 

Rest in His arms!

If you don't know this man they call: Jesus. PLEASE let me introduce you. He will completely ROCK YOUR WORLD if you'll let him.

DeAnna <3

my protector

My Daughter, 

I am your shield of protection. Many times you wonder where I am in the midst of the battle that rages around you. You feel abandoned on the battlefield. Don't be afraid and don't lose faith. I am here, and I am always victorious. Sometimes I will lead you to shelter for safety and restoration. Other times I will ask you to join Me on the front lines in the heat of the battle. The truth is, I can kill any giant that threatens your life, but, just like David the shepherd boy, its up to you to march forward, pick up the stones and face your giant. I love to prove My strength when the odds are the greatest and hope is the smallest. I am truely your shelter and your deliver- I will protect you no matter where you are.

Love,

Your King and your Protector

<3